I am participating in a group study, going through Lisa Terkeurst's book "UNGLUED". She talks a lot about "imperfect progress", and I am trying to grab hold of that idea. The Lord truly knows (and so do I) that I AM imperfect, I am trying to hold on to the truth that stepping toward my goals and not meeting them is progress.
So, in the spirit of that, I am going to share a quilt I finished in February. Then I'm going to do something that is difficult for me, I'm going to share the story of that quilt.
I started this quilt 10 years ago. I completed 3 others before finishing this one. |
For obvious reasons, the pattern is called "Starry Night". I think the variety of stars is so much fun to look at! |
This star is a nod to the joy and fulfilment I found in being a stage manager, I still miss that part of my life. |
I'm very excited to have finished this project, as I said it's taken me just under 10 years. The "why" is a difficult story for me to share.
When Andy and I went to South Africa, we went fully expecting to get pregnant during our time there. This quilt began as my "Prayer Quilt" for our baby. Africa was a difficult and rich time in my life. I accomplished things I never would have considered possible, I created intricate sets and staging out of nothing, made lifelong friends, experienced cultures some people have never heard of... and we did not get pregnant.
I finished hand piecing the top of the quilt 6 years ago in South Africa... and folded it away. I was beginning to feel helpless and hopeless in this particular journey and I couldn't hold the quilt in my lap and work on it without having those feelings rise up in me.
It stayed folded away until January of this year. I brought it out and finished it. I am still not pregnant, and some days that seems even further away than it did when I folded my work away in South Africa.
However, I am no longer accepting "helpless and hopeless" in my life. I am far from helpless. I am a capacitous, creative, loving woman with a deep abiding joy in Jesus that is my strength. I am not hopeless, I am growing in hope.
So, I don't know where this journey will end, but I am digging for my joy and my hope every day... kind of like getting a garden ready for Spring.
To that end, I put the quilt up in our bedroom. It's a baby quilt so it fits perfectly on my red bench.
And I see it every morning when I wake up... and I smile.
Joy and Hope!
Karlie
Oh, Karlie...your quilt is so beautiful in so many ways. Inspiring and significant. Did your heart pound out of your chest when you hit "Publish" on this post? Thank you - thank you for sharing your heart and your hope.
ReplyDeleteI need to talk to you my friend...I feel like the joy and energy and grace and me of my 'youth' (I know I know I'm still young, but it's how I feel) is gone and I have to fight the anxiety and darkness daily to just keep smiling. I love you so much and I wish we could dance in the rain together. I'm so proud of you.
ReplyDeleteI need to talk to you my friend...I feel like the joy and energy and grace and me of my 'youth' (I know I know I'm still young, but it's how I feel) is gone and I have to fight the anxiety and darkness daily to just keep smiling. I love you so much and I wish we could dance in the rain together. I'm so proud of you.
ReplyDelete